


The Long Road

by darklioness82



Category: Scott & Bailey
Genre: Angst, F/F, Femslash, Mild Language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-18
Updated: 2016-12-18
Packaged: 2018-09-09 11:37:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8889304
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darklioness82/pseuds/darklioness82
Summary: Scene/episode addition; what happened at the end of Gill's retirement bash?





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [featherxquill](https://archiveofourown.org/users/featherxquill/gifts).



There had been a charged atmosphere at the end of Gill’s retirement party. The DJ had appropriately begun to wind down the music with several slow numbers and various couples, including Rachel and Will, Janet and Rob, took over the floor with their overt displays of affection. A modicum of alcohol had some of the blame for the drunken smooches and clashing of hips and lips, but it only fuelled what had already been started long before that evening. 

 

Julie watched from her barstool, nursing the same glass of wine she’d had in her hand for the last hour. She’d decided that it would be best to keep her wits about her, make sure that Gill made it home in one piece. Sammy had decided to stay away, he felt that it was his mum’s party and he’d actually organised a family lunch at the local pub on Sunday to celebrate the occasion instead. 

 

Julie looked on as Gill was scooped up into the various arms of her friends and colleagues, danced around in circle and then on to the next person. She looked like she was having a great time but Julie could tell that she’d had enough just after the speeches. She only stayed for everyone else’s benefit, it wasn’t like a wedding where it was expected she’d leave earlier than the guests. But this was to be her last hurrah so Julie understood why Gill had wanted to keep up the pretence of someone who was confident and happy to be taking early retirement. 

 

Somehow their eyes found each other as Gill was twirled in Will’s arms, Rachel clapping and laughing to one side of the pair and Janet chuckling over Rob’s shoulder. Julie swallowed down the lump in her throat and smiled back at her best friend. There was an ever present tinge of jealousy, irrational and unfounded, but it was there all the same. She may not ever have the chance to be Gill’s lover but she was her closest friend and the one who knew her best. However, it wasn’t enough, had never been enough, and guilt settled itself neatly next to her jealousy. 

 

It was so classically stereotypical it was fucking hilarious; lesbian falls for straight best friend, what a cliche! There were times where Gill had hypothesised she could be open to it, in the early days of their friendship when she’d quizzed Julie in her youthful naivety on what lesbians actually  _ did _ in bed and so forth. There had never really been a sense of propriety between them; Gill giving Julie the ins and outs of pregnancy and childbirth when she was expecting Sammy, peeing in front of each other, farting after a curry and a bottle of wine each. Julie had even chucked Gill into a cool shower to wake her up after one particularly heavy night and Gill had pulled her in next to her. They’d begun fully clothed to be fair but it ended up impractical and they’d showered together just to get it done.  

 

They’d been there for each other for the emotionally messy stuff too, births and deaths, relationship beginnings and break ups, career highs and lows. There were times when Julie wondered if Gill had any other friends and then other times they went months without seeing each other, particularly when Sammy had been small and Gill had made acquaintances with the other mums from the nursery and then later, school. That was never going to feature in Julie’s life, lesbian or not; kids were absolutely fine as long as they were someone else’s. Then Julie had lost her dad and Gill was the first person at her door with a bottle of wine, a childfree evening and a shoulder to cry on. 

 

Julie had got herself into a bit of a funk as she’d always sought her father’s approval; a retired police officer himself, she’d been the only one of her siblings to follow in his footsteps. She’d come out when she was a teenager (it was less difficult than trying to pretend otherwise, how people had ever thought that she was straight was beyond her) but her news had gone down like a lead balloon and she felt like she had been trying to make up for it ever since. The hurt and regret that she’d never been able to show her father that she was truly happy and settled weighed heavily in her heart and when she finally achieved the rank of Superintendent she was sad that her father had not been there to see it. She and Gill never did go too long without catching up after that period in her life. 

 

Back on the dance floor and as Gill’s dance with Will wound down, the younger woman shot Julie a look which when straight to her core. She couldn’t quite decipher what it meant, it wasn’t a look she was used to seeing from her best friend but what she  _ does _ understand is that her heart is full and there’s emotion waiting to pour out once this evening has finally come to an end. The DJ announces that was the last song and starts to pack up his records, leaving the whirling disco lights to continue illuminating the normally bland magnolia walls of the police club. Julie continued to watch from afar as Rachel gave her boss (now ex-boss) a tearful hug goodbye. Rachel’s almost like the daughter Gill never had; her protege, her project and now, in all likelihood, her successor. Janet’s been her friend, her peer and back up on the parenting front. Their hug and kiss on the cheek is next but it’s not quite so final, their friendship will continue and last through to Janet’s retirement and it will see grandchildren for them both. Gill dutifully completes the round of farewells, hugs and kisses and then looks up to see Julie, still sat there, patiently waiting, as she always has done. 

 

The best friends are left alone as the couples file out and leave together. Gill settles the bar tab from her earlier bout of generosity and still not a word is spoken between them. It’s almost as though they’re hovering on the edge of something happening, of something life-changing being said, but neither one is quite brave enough to go first. Gill fiddles with her credit card and the receipt, shoving it into a pocket in her handbag before turning to Julie and nodding her head definitively. 

 

“Ready?” There’s no need to ask if Julie’s booked a cab, of course she has and it’s been waiting for them for the last five minutes. Julie looks at Gill pointedly and she pins her with a deadly serious expression. 

 

“More importantly, are you?” It’s a loaded question, has nothing to do with going home for the night and works on multiple levels. Gill almost retorts with her usual wit and sarcasm but she’s been putting up a front for the whole evening and she has no more energy left to do so. Besides, if she can’t be herself with Julie, then there’s no hope left in the world. Gill reaches out and laces her fingers with her best friend’s, brushes some of the hair from her face and back behind her ear with the other. 

 

“No, not really. But I think, with a little bit of help, I could be.” It’s not exactly the declaration Julie was looking for and it’s still reasonably ambiguous but it’s a start, of sorts, and Julie knows all too well that from small beginnings the greatest of adventures can be had. 

 

“I’m sure that can be arranged. Come on Slap, let’s get you home.” Gill musters one last little piece of courage and presses a gentle kiss to Julie’s lips. It’s chaste but lingers just enough to nudge them a little further out of the friendship zone and into deeper territory. Julie meets Gill’s lips out of instinct and one tightly coiled knot of guilt in the pit of her stomach unfurls and ebbs away. They then hear the impatient beep of the cab waiting outside and the moment is broken. 

  
With Gill’s head on her shoulder in the back of the cab, it's easy for Julie to imagine a more fulfilled future than she'd thought she'd have. There's a very long way to go before then but the weight of Gill’s hand tightly clasped in hers means that there's hope.


End file.
